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Monday, February 20, 2012

Complaint: Speeches

I would like to file a complaint to the manager of Speechgiving--

Recipient: Manager of Speechgiving
From: An Annoyed Student
Complaint:

WHY!?!?!??!?!?!?!?

I hate speeches.

And especially if I have to practice it for a week. Or two.

So this is what happened: My teacher, Let’s just call him Mr. A, just to fill in the blank.

Mr. A, my English Literature teacher ( C: it sounds so official.) told us we had to give a speech on anything we liked. He told us this on, let’s say, Monday. Or Tuesday. I forget. Whatever.

He then gave us time in class on Wednesday to research on the topic. Then he spent Thursday and Friday somewhere else with us stuck with a sub.

He told us the speeches were due Monday. That gives just less than a week to research, write, and practice a speech! For a “major grade.” D:

So we all (hopefully everyone) stressed out and practiced over the weekend. I did, at least. I spent Sunday, in a car going to New York, mouthing my speech (because if I said it out loud, my brother would recite along with me, which is not convenient at all).

I was all, “I’M READY FOR THIS. (…not.)” by Monday.

Guess what?

We walk into class, Mr. A goes, “Hey, guys, your speeches are postponed to next Monday.”

Naturally, I felt a combination of anger and happiness. Anger because I COULD HAVE SPENT ALL THAT TIME IN THE CAR PLAYING GAMES and not reciting speeches on Death Penalties, and I was stressing out over nothing. And it meant another week of stressing out and practicing.

And happiness because, well, I didn’t have to go up today. Or tomorrow. Until Friday.

SO I was so happy that I didn’t practice. And therefore I was not ready the following Monday.

He called up volunteers on the day of the speech-giving. And apparently, many of my peers felt the same emotion as me, as they wanted to get it over with and stop getting stressed for two weeks.

Then on Tuesday. I did not go up.
Wednesday, I did not go up.

Thursday, I was planning to—but a person who was very good at speech-giving engrossed us into a speech and somehow tricked us into thinking this was a college course and we were free to ask questions for the whole period. So basically, Thursday, we spent class time asking questions about how disgusting McDonald’s really is (not the taste, the health).

And Friday we had off because of President’s Day Weekend.

Therefore, Here I am, much stress on mind, for around three weeks. And still not ready. If only he had not postponed, I would have been ready to give the speech. And I would not be filing this considerably very long complaint.

 

Anyhow, Mr. Speech Manager,

Please prohibit speeches from all classrooms around the world. That is what I would like to suggest.

Nawjustkidding, because when I go up to present when I get a job (if I get a job, that is), I’ll probably have no idea how to present.

But just for the fun of it.

 

Yeahnevermind.


Sincerely,

An annoyed student who doesn’t like speeches and public speaking.

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